Showing posts with label Anthony Weiner. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Anthony Weiner. Show all posts
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
If you take away the bun, where does the Weiner go?
“New York must lose two House seats in 2012 due to slow population growth, and one of those districts is almost certain to be in New York City. Mr. Weiner represents a sprawling district in Queens and Brooklyn that borders six other congressional districts and thus could be an easy target for elimination. Due to the Voting Rights Act, none of the existing districts with a majority of black or Hispanic voters can be realistically rubbed out. But Mr. Weiner lacks that protection and already sits in a district where he is on shaky political ground, having won with only 59% of the vote in the Democratic landslide year of 2010“. - John Fund, Wall Street Journal Political Diary, 06/07/2011
Thursday, June 9, 2011
How to Talk to Your Kids about Anthony Weiner’s Penis - Andy Borowitz
"Because I’ve dealt with this nettlesome issue so much over the past few days, I thought it might be helpful to publish the following tips to help concerned parents talk to their kids about Anthony Weiner’s penis:
Could what happened to Anthony Weiner’s penis happen to my penis?
No. Anthony Weiner’s penis has many followers on Twitter. Your penis isn’t even on Twitter. Someday, when your penis gets much older, it may be on Twitter. But that’s nothing to worry about, because many people believe the world will end before then.
If someday my penis is on Twitter and someone sends pictures of it to everyone in the world, what should I do?
Most people go through life without ever having their penis sent to everyone in the world. But if it does happen, just say that the whole thing is a “distraction.” That’s a long word which means it’s your penis but you don’t want to talk about it.
Could Anthony Weiner’s penis hack my penis’s Twitter account and send pictures of my penis to people?
No. Anthony Weiner’s penis is too busy to do something like that.
If there is a God, why does he let so much pain and suffering happen to Anthony Weiner’s penis?
God does many wonderful things. He made you, and Mommy and Daddy, and the sun and the moon and all of the food that we eat. But sometimes God gets bored, and that’s why He made the people who invented Twitter."
Link to entire article appears below:
http://www.borowitzreport.com/2011/06/02/how-to-talk-to-your-kids-about-anthony-weiners-penis/
Could what happened to Anthony Weiner’s penis happen to my penis?
No. Anthony Weiner’s penis has many followers on Twitter. Your penis isn’t even on Twitter. Someday, when your penis gets much older, it may be on Twitter. But that’s nothing to worry about, because many people believe the world will end before then.
If someday my penis is on Twitter and someone sends pictures of it to everyone in the world, what should I do?
Most people go through life without ever having their penis sent to everyone in the world. But if it does happen, just say that the whole thing is a “distraction.” That’s a long word which means it’s your penis but you don’t want to talk about it.
Could Anthony Weiner’s penis hack my penis’s Twitter account and send pictures of my penis to people?
No. Anthony Weiner’s penis is too busy to do something like that.
If there is a God, why does he let so much pain and suffering happen to Anthony Weiner’s penis?
God does many wonderful things. He made you, and Mommy and Daddy, and the sun and the moon and all of the food that we eat. But sometimes God gets bored, and that’s why He made the people who invented Twitter."
Link to entire article appears below:
http://www.borowitzreport.com/2011/06/02/how-to-talk-to-your-kids-about-anthony-weiners-penis/
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